I was going to be aborted by my mother — moved by the same thought that leads many women to think the same way about their pregnancies, with 100% of the excuses and 0% of the responsibility. My case was similar to many others: my mother was only a 24-year-old "wee girl" and could not see how she could raise a child on her own.
Many women have been told that the living being inside them is not a human being until a certain number of weeks — that it is only a "foetus". Today I am going to prove to you that this is a big lie: not with science, not with literature, not with empty talk based on what I think or tend to believe, but with facts and with my own life. Read it, and share it if you can.
Let us start with a real story that a very famous Brazilian priest, Fr Leo (in memoriam), went through on a certain occasion early in his ministry. A woman sought him out for counsel: she was a single mother of one child and had become pregnant again. Her boyfriend had told her to have an abortion, and she also thought that was the best option, since they had no means of supporting all three of them plus another child.
Fr Leo welcomed her in his parish office one day and said to her, 'Very well, my darling. So you are looking to abort, are you? I am going to tell you what you are going to do instead: you are going to bring your six-year-old boy here, to my office. I have a gun in one of my drawers here, so instead of aborting the one in your womb, we are going to abort the other one — he is already here, after all, and he has already lived a while. It is better to do that because at least you give the opportunity for the other one in your womb to come to see the light of the day, ok?'
She was deeply shocked at his reaction — all the more because he was a priest of the Catholic Church. She said she would never allow that to happen, since she loved her son dearly and she was not a murderer; she just wanted to sort things out in the least bad way possible. Then Fr Leo told her, 'Having an abortion makes you a murderer all the same! Do you think the human being inside of you is just a clump of cells? No — that is a child of God, and in the same way that you think it is wrong to kill your six-year-old boy, it is wrong to kill the baby in your womb.'
End of story: she broke down in tears, desperate, for she did not realise what she had been about to do — she was going to become a murderer. Fr Leo then offered her all the support she needed in that difficult moment of her life so that she would not abort. And that child is alive today thanks to someone who taught his mother that abortion is the same as murder.
From that story we can learn something very serious: women with their minds set on ideologies that proclaim "My body, my choice" or "Right to abort" — or on any of these demonic movements — are no different from any criminal who has intentionally killed and gone to jail. They are assassins, murderers, killers, working a diabolical work. And it is even a thousand times worse, for they are shedding innocent blood.
If someone tells you that it is your right to abort because it is your body and you should do whatever you want with it — that we are in the twenty-first century — I have some bad news, and a touch of reality to bring to your heart: you are going to become a murderer. And the worst type of murderer: the one who kills an innocent who cannot defend himself.
I want to tell you a story from the Holy Scriptures and show you what God's reaction is to the sin of killing an innocent. It took place when Cain and Abel had made their offerings to God, called Yahweh in the Old Testament.
"Time passed and Cain brought some of the produce of the soil as an offering for Yahweh, while Abel for his part brought the first-born of his flock and some of their fat as well. Yahweh looked with favour on Abel and his offering. But he did not look with favour on Cain and his offering, and Cain was very angry and downcast. Yahweh asked Cain, 'Why are you angry and downcast? If you are doing right, surely you ought to hold you head high! But if you are not doing right, Sin is crouching at the door hungry to get you. You can still master him.' Cain said to his brother Abel, 'Let us go out'; and while they were in the open country, Cain set on his brother Abel and killed him. Yahweh asked Cain, 'Where is your brother Abel?' 'I do not know,' he replied. 'Am I my brother’s guardian?' 'What have you done?' Yahweh asked. 'Listen! YOUR BROTHER’S BLOOD IS CRYING OUT TO ME FROM THE GROUND. Now be cursed and banned from the ground that has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood at your hands. When you till the ground it will no longer yield up its strength to you. A restless wanderer you will be on earth.' " (Genesis 4:3-12)
The woman who has an abortion becomes the new Cain, killing an innocent by her free will and consent. Regardless of the reasons that led her to it, that blood will always be crying out to God from the ground. We should start to call such cold-blooded women — like Cain — or add the title "murderer" to their names.
Many people have no idea how terrible the consequences of such a decision could be in their lives, and they do not think at all about the consequences that may be brought into their own story and future, and into the lives of those around them. It is one of the worst sins that can exist, and it cries out for God's wrath and justice.
And we are telling you this prophetically, so that you know:
"The retribution of God from heaven is being revealed against the ungodliness and injustice of human beings who in their injustice hold back the truth." (Romans 1:18)
We do not want to hold back the truth, but rather to tell you about it — for Jesus is Truth itself, the One who can set us free (Jn 8:32). He is the Way, the Truth and the Life (Jn 14:6), and we have no power against the Truth whatsoever (2Cor 13:8).
I know that many people do not like to use spiritual and Christian arguments, and others are atheists. However, there is one place on Earth, in a very particular and special way, where God actually puts his hands. And that wonderful place, worthy of receiving God's hands, is the womb of a pregnant woman.
This is what the psalmist King David taught us in this wonderful psalm:
"[For the choirmaster Of David Psalm] Yahweh, you examine me and know me, you know when I sit, when I rise, you understand my thoughts from afar. You watch when I walk or lie down, you know every detail of my conduct. A word is not yet on my tongue before you, Yahweh, know all about it. You fence me in, behind and in front, you have laid your hand upon me. Such amazing knowledge is beyond me, a height to which I cannot attain. Where shall I go to escape your spirit? Where shall I flee from your presence? If I scale the heavens you are there, if I lie flat in Sheol, there you are. If I speed away on the wings of the dawn, if I dwell beyond the ocean, even there your hand will be guiding me, your right hand holding me fast. I will say, 'Let darkness cover me, and the night wrap itself around me,' even darkness to you is not dark, and night is as clear as the day. You created my inmost self, knit me together in my mother’s womb. For so many marvels I thank you; a wonder am I, and all your works are wonders. You knew me through and through, my being held no secrets from you, When I was being formed in secret, textured in the depths of the earth. Your eyes could see my embryo. In your book all my days were inscribed, every one that was fixed is there. How hard for me to grasp your thoughts, how many, God, there are! If I count them, they are more than the grains of sand; if I come to an end, I am still with you. If only, God, you would kill the wicked!-Men of violence, keep away from me!- those who speak blasphemously about you, and take no account of your thoughts. Yahweh, do I not hate those who hate you, and loathe those who defy you? My hate for them has no limits, I regard them as my own enemies. God, examine me and know my heart, test me and know my concerns. Make sure that I am not on my way to ruin, and guide me on the road of eternity." (Psalm 139:1-24)
The emphases above are mine, and they declare clearly what God does while we are in our mother's womb: he creates our inmost self and knits us together. That is wonderful. In the holy secret of a womb, each and every one of us was formed and textured.
If you ask someone who knits, you will get the answer and understand what we mean. Take the definition as it appears on Wikipedia: "Knitting is a method by which yarn is manipulated to create a textile or fabric for use in many types of garments. Knitting creates multiple loops of yarn, called stitches, in a line or tube."
In other words: God uses the man's sperm when it meets the woman's ovum, and from that very moment he begins to knit a new life. He does that with his own hands! That is the kind of love God has for us: from our very conception, he creates our inmost self, knitting us in our mother's womb.
A very important thing that should be taught and said to everyone who doubts God's wonders: God places a soul at the very moment of conception, which is what makes that wonderful meeting of the man's and the woman's contributions a human being. It is not a foetus, it is not a clump of cells, it is not an unwanted happening — it is a human being, deeply wanted and loved by God. You can call it whatever you want, but from that very first moment of existence, that tiny human being has a soul.
Those who are a bit sceptical about it can turn to Science (which is acclaimed and adored as a god nowadays) and ask the scientists this: if they know everything about a human being, if they know all the physical components that make up a human body, if all the elements that compose it are on the periodic table and there are no new ones — why do they not create a human being?
The answer is just one, and it already answers those who wonder, "Where does the soul come from? At what specific moment does a human being receive a soul?" It is neither after nor before the very moment of conception. That is the specific moment in which God places it. And since Science still cannot produce a soul, consequently it cannot produce a human being either.
Well, just for starters, we can refute a couple of arguments that run inside these diabolical anti-God movements, in which they teach women that the being inside them is just a clump of cells put together — one that is still not formed and still needs a few weeks before it can be considered and called a baby. It is a baby, a wonderful human being that is being textured and knitted by God’s hands.
Let us get back to the story of my life, which is the reason why so many of you are here. As I wrote at the start of this chapter, I was going to be aborted by my mother. And how do I know that? I need to tell you, briefly, some important points of my story and how I was conceived.
First of all, my mother was, in a way, raised by her two sisters and one brother. My grandmother got married and had four children. Not long after, my grandfather cheated on her and left home to live with his mistress. So she was left on her own to raise four children.
In Brazil, on her own, her greatest worry was to provide food and a roof for her children. In order to do that, she — who had left school at the age of eight — worked very hard day and night, holding two jobs. So my mother grew up in that environment, without much support or guidance from her parents.
At the age of 24, she lost her virginity to my father and fell in love with him. My father was very popular with women. She did not have many chances, since he was living a licentious life. But after a while he got engaged to the woman he eventually married — and is still with her to this day.
Without much guidance, my mother was determined to have a son by my father, regardless of the situation he was in at the time. When she found out that he was engaged and that this was not going to happen, she resorted to a black-magic spell (offered to the devil) in order to conceive a child by him. And so it happened: she conceived in February 1990, and my father married three months later.
I am not sure whether that was an attempt to get him back and break his engagement or just a craze in her mind about having a son by him; but when she realised the madness of what she had just done, she freaked out. Looking at her bright future of parties, sex and pleasures, all ending in this insane decision, she had a brilliant idea: abortion!
She had wanted to become pregnant; but at the same time, when she realised that she actually was pregnant, she decided it was too much. She was only 24 years old. She was going to lose her job. She was going to lose her future. She was going to lose everything she had always dreamed of. She was going to lose her life...
She kept that thought in mind: "I am going to abort this thing inside of me. I am going to put an end to this suffering and to this future of uncertainties. I do not need to go through that...". And something inside of her would say: "Don't do that. Don't do that." But her mind was made up, and that thought kept going for days, which became weeks, and then months.
Her pregnancy was happening in front of her eyes; inside of her, things were changing, and she was going to abort, since it was only a foetus, not a human being. That occupied her mind for months — until, very stressed and crying day and night, her friends offered her all the support she needed in that difficult moment. They were God-sent. They were angels who, simply by talking to her and offering support, made her change her mind, and she gave birth to me in November 1990.
Thirteen years later, I became a teenager. It is true that I faced so many difficulties from the moment I was conceived; but those are no reasons why I should not have been born. "Life is not always very good, but it is always worth it" — that is what my father would say, carrying this slogan with him almost like a rule of life.
As a teenager I became a very rebel one. I felt insecure, lonely, going on through dark times and did not have much support from my parents. My mom could not give what she did not have and that was all that I most needed: love.
There is a power in 3 words that many parents, relatives, friends and even couples forgot about and do not know how to say it in an effective way because they don’t say wholehearted and don’t practice much: "I love you". So I lacked that a lot at this stage of my life...
Inside of me there was a kind of hatred and every sort of bad feeling against my mother. It was not just the mere rebellion that many teenagers go through; it was something deeper, more profound. It was inside of me, and I did not know where it came from. From the age of 13 until the age of 15, there were only two alternatives of happiness or fulfilment inside of me: to kill my mother, or to kill myself.
It was a very strong and hard feeling that some people who are reading now will understand. The simple thought of suicide or of killing someone should cause horror in a healthy mind, but it caused none in mine — that is why it was always constant. If only there had been some way to make it stop...
At the age of 15, I had a wonderful encounter with Jesus Christ in the Catholic Church. I was baptised, received the sacraments and became a Christian. The love of God that I started to feel at this time was everything I had ever needed in my whole life and had not known existed. Saint Thomas Aquinas used to say, 'Who found the love of God in this life, found everything that they needed!' So that was and still is a reality in my life: God’s love is everything we need in this life!
But even with God's love in my heart, in my soul, in my mind, and with the joy of the Holy Spirit overflowing in me, there was still a big and very necessary step to take towards my mother — to love and forgive her. And it was a very difficult one, and I did not understand why. After years and years of going to church and praying and so on, I still had too many troubles with that. She was the one who needed to come to me, and not the other way round.
One day I made a decision to go to her and tell her that I loved her. I still remember that day like it was today... I went to hug her and told her I loved her and she pushed me away. After a couple of weeks doing that it became natural. And God, in his mercy and love, after five years showed me my mother as a victim instead of a villain (as I used to see her, and to blame her). Only then could I forgive and love her with all my heart, at the age of twenty.
When I was 24, I went to a week-long retreat in São Paulo, in Brazil, called Agapeterapia (in English, this would be something like "healing through love"). There I was led to relive all the dark and difficult moments of my life — from my conception onwards — in the light of the grace and the love of God.
To my surprise, I relived that very moment of my conception and could even feel the hatred and fury my mother had towards me when I was in her womb, when she was wanting to abort me — because the smallest thought or feeling toward a tiny baby is huge, and the baby feels everything. I also relived the moment when her friends came by and offered her support, and she gave up on aborting.
When I got back home from that week — and weeks before coming to live in Belfast — my mother opened up to me and told me what she had been holding back about our story. She was the one who told me she had performed a black-magic spell offered to the devil, in order to have a son by my father. And she did not have the courage to tell me, but she told my sister about wanting to abort me, and about the support she had received from her friends.
That is an extract from my own story, and I am opening it up to you so that you may come to know the truth about pregnancy and human life. Perhaps the most important thing you should take from all these lines you have read is this: God places a soul at the very moment of conception, when the elements of life of a man and a woman meet.
Obviously I went through all of that, and it could not have been different — if not to say it all the more loudly: every life is sacred and precious. Regardless of the situation and the conditions of a pregnancy, God puts his hands into every woman's womb and knits a human being, with a wonderful soul and heart, body and spirit. Do not let people convince you of the opposite.
The biggest gift God gave us was the opportunity to be co-creators with him! For those who are called to that vocation, after marriage we are called to be fruitful, to multiply and to bring forth life. The father should give all of himself, and the mother as well, offering to the new baby a home with a family that loves each other.
To those women who want to have sex with no responsibility, thinking they can do whatever they want with their bodies and that they are lords of their bodies and of their destinies — being a mother is a gift from God. It is not something you want or do not want; it is a calling, a wonderful gift, a precious wonder that God places in their bodies, so that they may collaborate in his plan of love and life.
How many couples would love to have this gift from God and do not have it? How many couples are looking to an orphanage to adopt a child who will make their life more complete? Even if you do not want your child, there will always be someone who does. God will always want them.
Think about all the women who are infertile and who, regardless of what they do, cannot generate a life in their wombs. And how many others have this gift and think it is a disgrace to be pregnant, that they are not ready for it, that they are too young, that they are not capable of upbringing a child, that there aren’t a human being inside of them yet... That makes me cry and should have the same effect on everyone who can see how cruel is it!
The fact that in some countries it is legal to have abortions is itself a disgrace. A life is a life, and whatever a government, or a president, or a nation, or the world says, an abortion is always going to be a crime. There is an assassin — the mother — and a victim — the baby (regardless of his age or size) — who is going to be violently and brutally murdered.
It is so truly a murder that nowadays, in many countries, the law is being changed and adapted to the reality of these crimes — to the point that people are even talking about a late abortion. By their reasoning, a human being is not a human being merely by the fact that he has a mother and father and a soul. No — what makes a human being, for them, is the society he lives in.
So, if someone at the age of 6, 12, 27, 50 or even 80 was not aborted at the right time inside their mother's womb, we should still have legal ways of aborting them — and we will call that a "late abortion". That is the biggest disgrace and lack of grasp on reality that human beings are living through in this century. In other words: we are trying to change the moral and ethical foundations of human values, the very ones that hold a society together. Killing someone will become a normal thing, as long as you call it "late abortion".
On the matter of making abortion legal in a nation, there is a Colombian woman who herself had many abortions. Her name is Gloria Polo. One day she was struck by lightning and died. After they had nearly buried her body, she rose from the dead and now tells a touching testimony of how God showed mercy to her. The greatest thing she experienced in that near-death experience was related to abortion. I should say this is a personal revelation that you are free to believe or not.
She stood before the throne of God and went to her judgement. After failing to know the Ten Commandments, she was sent to Hell and began to fall toward it. Before actually entering Hell, she was caught by the heels by Saint Michael the Archangel, brought back, and given the opportunity of coming to the knowledge of many things related to all this.
She saw, on many occasions, a great number of devils being set free from Hell, and she asked her guardian angel why that was happening. The answer was that every abortion sets free many devils from Hell, and every time a nation legalises abortion, a thousand devils are released from there and authorised to go and live in that nation.
That is one of the reasons why the world is becoming, more and more, evil. People are cold and selfish. No one cares about others who are suffering pain and aching. Love has vanished in words and in acts. People are growing more and more vain and superficial. Men and women are living a pointless, sad, angry and empty life. The devils are inspiring this demonic lifestyle in the world.
Having that in mind I want to make an urgent appeal here: Let’s stop with this disgrace of abortion! Let’s stop with the hate and the lack of responsibility thinking we are lords of our own lives! Let’s vote no to abortion and do our best in order not to allow such disgrace to happen in our nation! Let’s help others who are in vulnerable situation and offer all the support in order not to have more abortions! Let’s be angels in the life of those who are passing trough dark times and tell them about their importance! Let’s spread love in words and good actions! Let’s say I LOVE YOU from the bottom of our hearts and change a life today!
God is calling his people to love, to receive and give love, to receive and give life, to receive and give goodness, to be what he wants from us. To be opened to forgiveness and to allow ourselves to start again! To allow God to make part of our lives and live a better, healthy, happy and full of joy new life in the love of Jesus Christ!
For those who have already had an abortion, I would like to leave a prayer for you to make, knowing that there is a place in heaven where your baby is. It is called the Place of the Innocent Souls. You killed your baby, perhaps moved by fear or ignorance — but the past is past, and Jesus looks at you today to tell you that your child is safe in his arms. All you need to do is ask your baby, whom you killed, for forgiveness, and to know that you will gain an intercessor in heaven; and in reparation, you will become a great advocate for life.
(For those who really feel the need, look for sound material on post-abortion healing and let the grace of the truth and of the love of God be poured out into your heart.)
"In the presence of God my father and my Lord Jesus Christ I want to bring my heart to you my dear child (if you did not name them, it is time to give them a name, even though you didn’t know if it was a boy or girl; you can choose it) I want to ask for your forgiveness over my horrible act of killing you. You know what led me to do that (tell to your baby with details what happened and let the tears of love and grace come down, if they come). It took me so long to realise and recognise the evilness of my act, thinking about myself and treating you like a thing, like a couple of cells. Forgive me for I did not know what I was doing!
I ask the Lord Jesus Christ, through the intercession of Our Lady, the mother of mothers, to pour down his precious blood over me and my soul, to forgive me from my terrible sin. Also I ask the Holy Spirit to prepare me and guide me to a graceful confession of my sins in the confessional. Forgive me Lord, for I was ignorant and silly. Restore my soul, which was destroyed after that atrocity and which still aches today. Restore my heart, which was broken inside and out and is still broken today. You have the power and the love and I open myself to receive that. I need your grace, o God, for I can not live anymore with this pain in my body, in my soul and in my heart.
Envelop all of my inmost being and knit me again inside your heart that was opened on the cross, O Jesus. I am asking in the power of your name and of your cross.
My little baby (say his or her name again), I ask you to pray for me, your mother, so that I may live a life of forgiveness and grace from now on. Intercede for me and help me from there in heaven to live a new life here on earth — a life that pleases God, a life full of love and peace. Help me, my little one, to forgive myself as well, and to let the love of God heal me and be poured out all over me.
Thank you, my little angel, for your love and forgiveness — they are recreating a new "me". Thank you, Jesus, for such grace, such love and such forgiveness. Thank you, Mary, my mother, for your intercession and your help. I want to live a life like you. I want to be the servant of God as well. Teach me to be faithful and also sing your Magnificat.
Blessed and praised be God forever. Halleluya, Amen!"
May God fill our hearts with his grace and teach us to live a new life with his love.
Catholic in Belfast



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